drunkcyclist2

Crew: PTD, Stunt, Slim, Coley, Dan, Butty, El Pres, 3 Sheds

Extended commute for a bit: Joe

Pub: Dunc

Route: BL, Old Road, Brideway to Windyways, Chazza & extension, Standing stone, Nessit, Hanging Gate, Higher up the Hanging gate road post pub.

Conditions: Clear skies, some breeze, cold, wet & muddy trails

Stats: 1 puncture for 3 sheds

Notes:

Big solar flare = predictions of aurora borealis visible across much of the UK, clear skies forecast, SLR & tripod ready…what could possibly go wrong!

An unusual ride-pub-ride plan hatched – to be at the highest pub, then climb up a bit more late for best chance of a spectacular display 🙂

Dan leading by example with a 100% 2014 attendance record, Coley & 3 Sheds also get their priorities right 🙂

Some things though never seem to change – its a long wait for Slim at BL (pre ride puncture excuse) fortunately we have been distracted our very own caped crusader in the form of Joe on his commute home. Next time we expect full on bat symbol on the back 🙂

Avoiding the slop on the zig zags, we see the skies above us clear as predicted, and the stars are super clear!

Orion’s sword (some debate as to if that is really what the ancients had in mind!) clearly visible

Some SLR faff at the start of chazza to practice on a shot of orion above the treeline – but the moon is too bright, and the setting too fiddly, so a setup in the pub will be the best plan then 😉

29er rigid whippets race past – but not for long as a turbo powered PTD demolishes them on the descent.

3 Sheds fed up with waiting for the rest of us, tells us of the motocrossers rules – they wait for no man! he then has to man up and head home alone as he has not spotted the ironic rear puncture before we set off 🙂 (later he tells of snapped tyre lever , and blown seal on pump..and much choice swearing!!!)

Cheeky smooth single malt snifter provided by Coley in the trees at Nessit before fun descent, and final climb to the Hanging Gate.

We have been away too long, it is snug, welcoming, parody of parodies, Hydes Mill flows, wifi connected and aurora forecast imagery loads to great expectation…..and it’s doing NOWT! visible line hovering just off the northern scottish coast, those darn Finns have sold us a pup! Ah well, the food is fabulous (she is keen to offload the rabbit & pheasant) the conversation is good, 2014 ideas are kicked around (Britains highest 10 pubs & yorkshire for the TDF ). Dan’s geekery knows no bounds as he shows he knows all things SLR as well! Dunc arrives after a very late start, and we get a cheeky call from G asking if we have seen it yet! Puddings temp too many, but eventually we must settle up, layer up, and depart. Despite the certainty of a auroral no show we still head up high (coaxed by a very assertive PTD) and enjoy cracking views, our own green novelty – Chartreuse from shot gun hip flasks, with more whisky chasers! Butty does his best to excite the atmosphere with charged particles of his own (we felt they should be green and visible!) and thus its a final rapid descent homewards. No “once in a lifetime” event, but definitely a “once in a season” set of views, and we can always ask Eric for his pics of the real thing 🙂

Post event comment from Aurora-Service.eu

“The much anticipated CME appears to have been more of a glancing blow to Earth than computer models suggested. As such there is no significant geomagnetic activity expected”

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TNR 2-1-2014 Fire Geeks

Friday, January 3, 2014

Crew: Slim, 3 Sheds, Coley, Stunt, Dan

Route: Bl, Zig Zag, Walker Barn, Chazza, Extension, Standing Stone, Nessit, Church House

Conditions: Windy, Muddy & wet trails, Occasional Rain

Notes:

Dan returns with a stated new years resolution to do 20 TNR’s this year 🙂

Not overly cold, but forecast rain later means one needs to be prepared!

Coley does a quick divert before the zig zag to collect waterproof trousers.

Fire in the sky near windyways as a chinese lantern becomes a flaming streak.

Chazza is fast & wet with just the occasional big rock on your chosen line 😉

Extension start needs care with muddy ruts, the marbles section “exciting”

From standing stone we head towards nessit – but stop at the abandoned building to shelter from the wind and test Stunts new bikepacking stove(s), magic titanium mega mug, and folding pot stand. Rusty nails issued whilst we wait for the mulled wine to warm through.

The coke can self build stove can’t cope with the conditions, but a trusty trangia does! warm wine all round 🙂

Warming of a different kind on the ascent of Nessit, and the old school descent is super fast (not sure the walkers were that impressed though). With the wind rising and rain in the air its a quick dash round the resevoir and early pub.

Leathers smithy closed shocker, but food available at the Church House! Storms “Looks like Rein Dear!” at a festive 4.8% went down very nicely. Shed-a-nory tales, and Coley shows us his Brazilian pics…Wet wet wet on the way home.

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TNR 19-12-2013 Christmas Spirit

Friday, December 20, 2013

Crew: El Pres, El Pud, PTD, G, Mr I, 3 sheds, Coley, Croxy, Doog, Slim, Stunt, BEB, Butty, TJ

Pub: Nic, Dunc, Mawds

Route: Bl,full Zig zags, Walker barn, Chazza, Narnia Bench, choice of route to Kings Head

Conditions: Freezing point c300m light snow up high, clear, very wet trails, icy roads

Notes:

Grand gathering at B, butty showing off his santa beard and new hardtail frame…was it just me or did it give the impression of being a decathalon special 😉

Long line of riders straggles out up the road and through the puddles and mud of the zig zags, and soon the light from the amazing low fullish moon is glinting off ice crystals and snow.

Ice crackles under tyre as soon as we turn off the main road, and there’s more white power dusted everywhere than the inside of nigellas handbag!

Chazza fast and wet, the sweetie tree is back in its full glory at the start of narnia, freezing mist patches providing atmosphere on the way to the bench.

Cocktail bar well stocked! fizz, blue one, red one, rusty one, laphroaig, pork pies and team mustard – tremendous.

We exchange seasonal greetings with the church house riders as they flash past, and then a true Christmas spirit story as the nancies appear and we treat them to our finest listerine stylee tipple before sending them on their way back to the happy valley.

No time for a second stop, a rapid descent into freezing cold air to the warm pub (via hardingland for the more adventurous)

Two tables, three courses, crackers, landlord and home made mince pies (its all too much!)

Reflections on the year, thoughts of what 2014 has to bring, and full blown hypothermia for El Pud (well done Vicky and Mawds for prompt action!)

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TNR 12-12-13 Return to the Vale

Sunday, December 15, 2013

Crew: PTD, El Pres, Slim, Coley, Stunt, 3 sheds with newbie Steve

route: BL, tea rooms, shining tor, grassy boggy route to hoolihey lane, dead mans hill, blaze hill, vale.

conditions: mild, hill fog higher up, wet later.

notes:

lame excuses or radio silence from all but four ! Nothing to do with the forecasts of torrential rain!!?? So all the more surprising when he of the fair weather reputation Monsieur trois sheds himself arrives with old school pal Steve! As we stayed low last week it’s time to go high again, and with some pleas for northerly pubs from late starters a route is hatched to take us to the vale.

Heading up the new road (with a just in time slim making us 7) we find hill fog once past the chazza turn. Eerily quiet – it seemed a very long way to the tea rooms, perhaps because it was easy to think you were further along than you really were.

Heading off road head mounted lights almost useless due to the reflection back off the water vapour, so maybe not the best conditions to get the most out of the route.

now staying close together as a bunch so as not to lose anyone, we manage to find the route and not get lost, have big offs or slip into swampy sludge! The stone gate posts loom out of the mist to show us we have crested the final ridge, now just a super slippy descent! Luckily we break out of the cloud part way down, so at least we can see again 🙂

its too wet to contemplate the final snicket by the fence, so PTD leads up right and over the field instead.

Time has ticked on , and the vale are not answering, so after a brief dally with going down the side of lamaload (sufficient lightage worrying a darkened car in the car park!) we take the road back .

big news – vale now serving late again, and staffed by ex Prestbury legh arms bar manager!

Moravka’s all round to start before some long hopping ale, we wonder where all the late starters area, to find they have all wimped out!!! Steve is quizzed on Phil’s past and the night is good! Whisky chasers are needed as it’s a flipping wet ride home – that rain had finally arrived!

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TNR 05-12-2013 Winter cometh

Monday, December 9, 2013

Words by Eric

Crew; El Pres, PTD, Big Events Bernard, Stunt, Mr Incredible, Eric
Pub; Slim

Lame Excuses; Croxy – school panto, Slim – wind on the line

Route; BL, Zig Zags, Charity, Narnia, Watery descent , traverse to road, climb to water bars of death descent, LHS, Bob’s bench, King ‘s head

Conditions; The UK in the grip of Armageddon like winds and high tides, BL quite quiet and but cooler than of late.

Stats; BeB runs out of volts but resorts to his trusty torch for the run to the pub

Notes;
With the weather forecast rather ominous a unanimous decision was taken to stay in the shelter of the trees. A steep climb in blustery conditions saw El Pres and Mr I set off like men who had been training in secret or taking something. The first snows of the winter were lying thinly on the sides of Charity which made the descent a little challenging.
Narnia and then to the watery descent. The top half of the descent was amazingly dry but it became clear where all the water had gone as we entered the lower part – everyone arriving at the bottom with wide grins !
We began the traverse and the snow began to fall, then fall a bit more, and a bit more until we were in a full on blizzard. Few made the wall without a dab across the snow and rocks. As we climbed back up the white coated road the water bars of death descent started to seem a bit of a dumb idea – so we carried on. Those bars are the slippiest substance on the planet and nearly claimed a couple more victims despite shouted warnings everywhere and going at dead slow ahead.
Fortunately food in the King’s Head was ordered for 9 so as the conditions deteriorated there was a vote for a charge down the left hand side, down the swoopy singletrack and down to civilisation. Bernard’s batteries died part way down and we were tempted to take him at his word when Captain Oates like he uttered “you go on chaps, I know the way from here”, but we hung back long enough to make sure his torch was working.

In the King’s Head there was a pie eating contest fuelled by pints of Landlord. The real stat of the night was that Stunt was the only one man enough to clean his plate including the sprouts !
We almost recruited a reserve team of WAGS for next week but press censorship is sometimes a good thing.
Whisky and brandy and then out into the winter chill.

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TNR 28-11-2013 The Dirty Dozen

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Words by Eric : Our second version of the events of the 28th November

Crew; El Pres, PTD, Stunt, Slim, Croxy, Doug, 3 Sheds, Mr Incredible, Butty, TJ, Gee, Eric

Lame excuses; Coley – Poorly

Route; Variations to the bottom of Charity, some via Teggs, and Hardingland, some straight up the road. Charity extension, Bottom o’ t’Oven, Tea Rooms, off road short cut to the Cat, Danebower, right hand descent, Cumberland Clough, Standing Stone, LHS, reservoir path, Sutton Hall.

Conditions; Too hot, layers being removed outside the Presidential Palace. Chilling later but nice and dry.

Stats; Butty – Derailleur faff outside the Presidential Palace
Offs – Butty and TJ
Lost – El Pres, PTD, Stunt, Slim, Croxy, Doug, 3 Sheds, Mr Incredible, Butty, TJ, Eric
Not lost – Gee

Notes;
A full peloton was in trouble before we got out of Barracks Lane, our route blocked by an angry chap in a 4×4. The self righteous citizen shouted abuse and pointed to the no entry sign before parking on the crossing zig-zags to go to the shop.

There was some debate as to route and the amount of climbing folks wanted so the 2014 Policy Changes were implemented and we split into smaller groups and scattered. There were no fallers on Teggs although most admitted to a skiddy dab or three. The climb up Hardingland never gets easier but at least it makes the ascent of Charity seem gentle. As we clattered down past Narnia another crew were just sneaking into our world but most of us stayed on down to the agreed rendezvous at Forest Chapel. We waited ages for Stunt and Gee, last seen at the top and in the end we gave ourselves up as lost and headed on. … em !

Whilst the steps on the snicket are getting bigger due to erosion no one expected the little rock garden which had appeared under the biggest one – it makes for tales of daring do at the bottom.
The long climb to the Cat allowed Stunt to catch us up, and us to catch 3 sheds who’d gone bikeabout earlier. Part way down Danebower we were surprised to find that we had rejoined the correct route and met up with Gee, the only one who had not been lost so far.
A few folks decided that discretion was better than the right hand descent but they didn’t include TJ who almost fell into the stream and who seemed concerned that he’d marked the paint on the orange Orange and Butty who had a nasty somersault onto some even nastier rocks. Butty wasn’t bothered about damaged plastic as he counted ribs.

Time was moving as fast as us so it was over Standing Stone and LHS down to the reservoir track where a snifter was taken at Bob’s bench. Further supplies of Glenmorangie from Gee’s bottom drawer were very welcome. Glasses were raised to the Doug and Eunice on their news.
Then it was everybody back on the bus to Sutton Hall.

Burgers for all except El Pres who ordered salad but it came with meat so all was well. The Endeavour was finished so Lord Lucan stepped in.

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TNR 2013-11-28 Anarchy in the UK

Friday, November 29, 2013

Words by Stunt : Our first version of the events of the 28th November

Crew: PTD, El Pres, G, 3 Sheds, Croxy, Slim, Butty, TJ, Mr I, Stunt, Doog, Eric

Route Set A: BL, Teggs, Hardingland, Crooked Yard Lane, Chazza, Extension, Cat, Danebower, RH side short Cut, Chumby Brook, Standing Stone, Resevoir Bench, Sutton Hall.

Anarchic options: zig zaggs & walker barn, narnia out and back!, danebower hollow & Chumby Clough, RH side forest tracks.

Conditions: Mild, still, wet & muddy in places.

Stats: Butt offs (again!)

Notes:

Forum responses are clearly no guide as a dozen riders assemble at BL, including a whisky laden G for the second week running 🙂

A rough route is set out to allow for splinter cells to opt for “hard” or “soft” to suit.

More than a few change options as we ascend buxton road and an interim regroup at forest chapel agreed.

Hard & Fast men race up Teggs, slither down, attack hardingland (Fives still the bikes to beat!) and pant up crooked yard to Chazza.

G leads Stunt astray on a Narnia wild goose chase (in his defence there was another group of riders that he saw go that way)

The both turn back (independently) and chase the main pack (now reassembled) down..or rather up!

Coats only needed at the Cat, the short cut is indeed faster (but the long way round more fun for some!) Butty finds that offing on the steepest slopes without pads is not a good thing 🙁

No rest for the tired (as G finally catches up) it’s a charge down chumby!

The quiet lane to standing stone looks like santa’s elves are marching with red & green lights a glowing!