drunkcyclist2

crew : Butty, El Pres, The Doog, Biggus Nickus, Eric, Slim

route : Barracks – Zig Zags – Old Buxton Rd Track – Chazza – Standing Stone – Short Forest Loop straight down to Ranger Centre – tracks to the Leathers – Sutton Hall

conditions : ..became dreadful rapidly after chazza.

stats :

1 borrowed 29er carbon full susser Scott
1 29er puncture
1 mid ride eyewash
Several tots of Rusty Nail

Notes :

Surprisingly dry for the first 45mins …then it all went downhill. From the point that Biggus nickus had a flat on the bling carbon 29er, partway down charity.

Just too damn wet.
But the Doog brought us “when all else fails, bring out the Rusty Nail”..as Nickus Biggus fixed his puncture. A back-of-the-Moon plan was quickly abandoned as the rain became more serious and Dr Eric and Nurse Peter had to attend to a Biggus Nickus poorly eye. Impressive first aid kit uncle Eric !

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TNR 19-4-2012 Wet Muddy Fun (and Three Shires for some!)

Friday, April 20, 2012

Crews:

A El Pres, Eric, Stunt, Butty, G, 3 Sheds, Doog, Dan

B PTD, Shaun, Dr Simon

C Slim, Dunc, Nic

Route:

A BL, Cat, Danwbower hollow, farm, 3 shires, Cuthorne, Chumby, LHS forest, Smithy

B Teggs, Forest, Kings head?, Smithy

C Chazza, Smithy

Conditions: Light rain, very wet trails, lots of water in Chumby brook.

Stats: Faffs to G (Chain) & Eric (Seatpost)

1 wet off to Stunt in chumby brook 😉

Notes:

With more excuses than a class of remedial students on a bad day, frantic texting sorts out 3 riding groups to suit sicknotes and general lateness!

Eric takes charge and leads the main body to 3 shires (after several failed attempts in recent weeks!)

Butty regains his normal place in the pack after changing his draggy tyres on the 456 carbon hubster..but a case of new bike syndrome is not love at first sight..he’s already got an Evil plan to change!

G’s after an Orange 29er but getting hold of one to test ride is tougher than a toughie in toughville on a tough day (to be continued)

Lambs in plastic macs and chasing the last glimmer of sunshine before the rain catches up on the way to the cat. A solitary motocrosser on the track to danebower hollow, and lots of standing water!

Dan calls to say he’e nearly with us up after a rapid pursuit, but as Eric takes no prisoners, Stunt waits and its 3 shires before we regroup.

Doog treats us to a particularly good rusty nail, cuthorne sandy rocky ascent very grippy despite the weather and almost cleaned by Dan & G. Lights on for Chumby and half light trickery. Plenty of wet arse syndrome by the bottom, and lots of water in the brook at the ford. Stunt does a comedy over the handlebars dunking ..and El Pres does the walk of shame over the bridge 😉

Bikers everywhere in the forest, some of them not ours! 20+ muddy, wet smilers in the smithy, to Palmers & Cumberland Ales, Wild Boar burgers & attempts to dry sodden kit by the fire. PTD delivers birthday cake for Graham..only to find the true recipient not there! And Butty & Dan already tucking into puds J ..be a shame to waste it ;-). Pete abandons us to collude with his new train mates! Axis behaviour nobbled by responsible innkeeping. Damp clothing = cold ride home.

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TNR 12-04-2012 Lyme Cordial

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Crew : Big Dan, Duncan, The doog, 3sheds & Slim

Pub : Mawds & Son 😉

Conditions : Suprisingly given the previous part of the day..no hail/rain/sleet. beautiful sunset. 10c at 6pm, 4c at 12 . Cold in the dips, No wind, crystal clear air.

Route : Barracks La, Hurdsfield, Swanscoe La, Redway Tavern, Ingersley vale, Poachers snicket, Pott Shrigley, unorthodox Lyme Park approach ….but we never quite entered it.q reverse
bowstones . Gritstone trail. drop to pott shrigley via erics’ celebration.
point. then bolly . the vale

Notes :
Leadership vacuum wonderfully evident..leading to slackish (13 mile , 1500ft ascent) ride but still worthy of the MTB moniker. Great to see Mr Dougan out again.

Views were stunning over the Cheshire plain with setting sun and crystal clear air. We had time to soak it up without being lambasted by a “leader”..;-)
Dan was deemed far too un stealth-mode in his attire and in his steed’s livery …to risk a properly- into-Lyme-Park sorte . A tip off of “ranger spotted” from a passing fell runner confirmed the wisdom of our decision. Reverse bowstones had a whole herd of deer staring at us in disbelief. The descent to Pott Shrigley was atmospheric but swampy in parts.
Light Nancy, Dinner Ale & Marovaka awaited us in the Vale.
Mawds & Son turned up too…but no Butty
Much chortling at the fact that Nigel Lawson, at 80, takes the half your age plus seven rule literally

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TNR 5-4-2012 Sun, snow and very cold toes.

Friday, April 6, 2012

Crew: El Pres, PTD, Slim, Eric, Dan, Joe, Dunc, Slim, Stunt,3 Sheds, Butty,Nic

Pub: Shaun

Route: BL, Cat, Danebower Hollow, RH side descent to Chumby, standing stone, RH side , cross forest, path to Resevoirs, Resevoirs, Church House.

Conditions: Still, clear, very cold later.

Butty arrives on his winters labour of love, the shiny red carbon 456 with blingy wheels that PTD drools over 😉 Picturesce ride to the Cat under blue sky, sun glinting off the snow edged fields, huge moon rising. less snow than feared at the cat, we set off in search of 3 shires. Across the top we soon hit sticky snow, pause to enjoy the superb sunset, let our tame photographer catch up, and then head down towards Cumberland brook. Tufty grass, and patches of snow that stop you dead catch out Dunc. Joe discovers that breaking through a snow bridge over a stream in shorts is a form of extreme refreshment, and extreme amusement for others. many curse poor choice of footwear! Riding the meltwaters down Chumby there is still time for a surprisingly dry and nice RH side, before cutting across to the lower path and racing around the Resevoirs ( collecting Nic at standing stone – chazza unrideable apparently)

Church house for many wibbly wobblers, Stella, warming of the toes, and a rapid descent into whisky fuelled axis territory. Joe becomes the evil barman! Slim the laughing Hyena 🙂 .snow and mud is still frozen onto wheels and frames for the ride home!

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TNR 29-3-2012 An audience with the Gourmet Grumpster

Saturday, March 31, 2012

From TNR 29-03-12 Hand Job and DID

Crew: El Pres, El Pud, Slim, PTD, Shaun, 3 Sheds, Butty, Croxy, Stunt, Big Dan

Chez. Mawds: Bernard

Route (Main Crew) : Old Buxton rd, zig zags, back eddisbury bridle way , teggs nose furtlings, Resevoirs,smithy, chazza, chez Mawds.

Route (El Pres & Slim): New Buxton rd, Chazza & Extension, Standing stone, Nessit, Across the Dam to Leathers, Coalpit Lane ascent, reverse zig zags chez Mawds.

Conditions: mild and dry, dusty trails

Slim arrives with loose cranks and 2 faffs later has to retire his steed, El Puds smugness at another’s poor maintenance only lasts until lighting up time when his TJ light fails (cheap seconds??)

(Editor’s note : Thanks to El Pres for loan of the “H@nd J0b”….ooh err missus. Hollowtech cranks suck..nowt wrong with sq taper)

Good to see Croxy out 🙂

From TNR 29-03-12 Hand Job and DID

Interesting over the top and down less travelled ways off Teggs, almost tempted by the sights and smells to stop off at the Smithy but a tight schedule means no slacking.

By the time we reach the start of chazza it’s touch and go on time so A & B groups to see who is fastest via chazza or via hardingland. nowt in it.

Chez Mawds we are treated to four fine curries, beer on tap, and entertainment in the form of El Pud interviewing Mawds in Desert Island Discs stylee. The Grumpster certainly has kept up with time times musically!

Four exceedingly fine single malts, Danny & Nigella on Youtube , belly laughs make it a night to savour 😉 GIIHH

From TNR 29-03-12 Hand Job and DID

Words by Stunt, Edits by Slim

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TNR 16-03-2012 Notubes & Biggus Nickus

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Words by Butty, posted by Pete

Out;
Butty, pud, pres, doog, PtD, son of PtD, Big Nic, the Ball, Gee.

Offs;
None

Punctures;
Butty, but no interruption to the evening, still made it home with<
50% of air (thank you notubes).

Presidents Alderly plan was scuppered by a PtD celebratory slack one.
There was no arguing especially with drinks as part of the plan.

From Barracks, straight up Buxton old and onto Teggs stone sitting
circle for some champagne to celebrate singledom for the PtD.  Yes
he's back on the market!  Some rusty nail too - well done Doog.

Then straight down and up by the leather smithy into the forest.  Some
naughty trail action and some off piste exploration just below Narnia.

Time was tight so road descent to PtD towers to taste test Shaun's
lager hybrid (he used ale yeast).  PtD's youngest scamps had a
chimenea fire and chocolate bread waiting, they train them well in the
dentist household.  Couple of pints later and off to the Church house
losing the Graham's and Biggus Nickus along the way.

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WNR 15-3-2-2012 Doublecrossed

Thursday, March 15, 2012

From WNR 14-03-2012 Crossers

Crew: Slim & Stunt

Route: Tythy, Bollin Valley, Withinlee lane , Swiss Hill, Edge, Owl track/artists lane, Bradford/Hocker, Legh Arms

Conditions: Clear & cool, but pretty dry trails

Yorkshire north shore wheel dinks & brake pad wear = cross bikes as plan B becomes plan A.

Are crossers a subconscious return to our early MTB roots? – narrow tyres & rigid suspension, and for the heck of it some relatively low lumens too. Riding as pair we startle a few ninja dog walkers by the bollin, feel the darkess more, hear much owl hooting and settle in to wide ranging conversation 🙂 En route to Alderley Edge the still cold air brings to ground level aromas of frying onions, woodsmoke and septic tanks!

Slim mentions the lack of ascent in his new urban commuter lifestyle – so Swiss hill remedies that! Cobbles are dry, but even with compact doubles its out of the saddle time, and a relief to get to smoother surfaces. Cold fingers now warmed from the inside we criss cross the edge – and explore the limits of grip, suprisingly good in mud, rather rubbish on roots, and there is a fair bit of meandering to find lines suitable for our steeds. Bradford lane requires good concentration and the assist brake position for maximum control! Planet spotting on Hocker lane (Slim wishes for an SLR) and then off to the Legh arms,where its under European occupation as the Milanese barman and Eastern European waitress are busy serving a rather full hostelry (only one “goose” step from Allo Allo :-)). Mild is the wrong answer so we cross over to Guiness to wash down the Fish & Chips. After putting the world to rights an “Alliance of Temperance” has us on our way before last orders to find it king cold on the way home! Eric is right two is a good number, it’s not about the bike, and mario andretti would have gone faster!

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TNR 08-03-2012 A (Derbyshire) Bridge Too Far ?

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Crew A : Eric, Shaun, Dan, Kersh, Nic
Crew B : Ptd, 3 sheds, TJ, Butty, El Pres,Coley, Slim
Pub : El Pud

Route A : Cat & Fiddle then Buxton circle ride (Derbyshire Bridge – edge of Buxton – Whitehall Adventure Centre – Ladder Hill – A6 crossing – Taxal – Pym’s Chair) – The Vale

Route B : Cat & Fiddle – Shining Tor – Yorkshire Northshore – Pym’s Chair – Windgather Rocks – Taxal – Kettleshulme – Brink Farm – Pott Shrigley – The Vale

Overall fairly mild for March but cold and windy on the tops . No Northern Lights or mass GPS failure, despite solar maelstrom predictions

Crew A report (from Dan) :

Eric goes large ! “no stopping, just ride. Any stragglers get left behind!”

Back of Ladder Hill is fantastic, quite technical and a lot longer then we all remember.

Shaun has a pinch flat and his main light fails. Kersh and Dan raid Nic’s rucksack for food.

It feels proper epic with views over Whaley Bridge, Chapel en le Frith and Stockport. Pym’s Chair is certainly not the last climb and we are all dreaming of food as we approach Rainow. 3.5 hours in the Saddle. Marvellous.

Crew B report (from Slim) :

Paul puts route options/ideas to Crew B in an inclusive democratic manner..but when Yorkshire Northshore blows your tyre and dents your rim it becomes “all his fault” 😉

Route to shining tor and pyms not too wet . The Windgather bit is great fun, proper MTBing , even with muddy bits. Tj punctures on the twisty rocky duck the trees bit.

Crew A even later out than us, and we had phoned in food orders from them …and we are still 15 mins from pub at 9.40pm!!

Vale is almost empty vale but..excellent selection of beers and lagers.

Shaun looks like he could have done with a written estimate of the cost before he committed to joining Group A.

Pud turns up in shorts…must be spring soon.

TJ brings out 2000 lumens to play with ?

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TNR 01-03-2012 We are drinking lager, it must be Summer !!

Friday, March 9, 2012

Crew

El Pres, 3 Sheds, El Pudd, Big Nic, Kersh, Butty, Ptd, Shaun, Big Dan

Pub

Mawds

Route

BL- Langley- Standing Stone- cheeky descent to Wildboarclough- A54-Eagle & Child- Gradbach- River Dane- (group B via Luds church) -Barlow Hill- Hanging Gate

Stats

1 off Butty
2 punctures El Pres & Big Nic
18 miles from BL to pub

Weather

Mild, dry & no wind (perfect)

Notes

Cracking pace from BL saw Palmer & Phil struggling to hang on ;). Interesting grassy descent from standing stone. A bit more climbing (phew) up to A54- Nic tries 20 seconds of extra hard pedalling and nearly has a heart attack. Eagle & Child track is fabulous- a little bit of everything- we must do it more often. Swoopy tracks down to YHA sees Big Nic’s & Palmers tyre go ‘pop’. Group splits, with the fast boys racing to Hanging Gate to secure food. By the Dane, Andy gets familiar with the wildlife & Dan discovers the river & the road are named after him. At the pub (Hello Boys!) Burgers for most, with a mix of bitter & Lager (well, it’s nearly summer now!). AoE with whiskey & water. Long, cool ride home. All good.
Report & Pics by Big Dan, Upped to the website by Pete.