drunkcyclist2

Crew: EL Pres, PTD, Butty, Troll, Lee, Stunt

Pub: Dunc

Route: BL, Zig Zags, Saddlers way, Crooked Yard Road, Charity Lane & Extension, Standing Stone, Nessit Hill, Ressies, Sutton Hall

Conditions: Mild but windy!

Notes:

Half our numbers were in the throes of lurgy recovery, and Troll and Butty with impressive chesty coughs..so PTD suggests riding hard to give them a good clearout!

With the wind rapidly strengthening, a reverse last week ish route is taken, and once Lee found his wallet we are quorate.

Early pace is a mark of things to come, no slacking on this ride! But not so severe that we can’t chat along the way.

Trails are reasonably dry, but still plenty of mud and puddles in the usual places. Saddlers way not greasy (always good!).

At the bottom democracy rules (mutiny?) and the route is diverted away from a Hardinland ascent, to “climb on tarmac” up Crooked Yard Road. Lungs are now producing plentiful quantities of residual slime, and there is definitely advantage in riding in front of the “expectorant brothers” 😉

They are doing well though, and the mini peleton is not strung out that much by the start of chazza. Where the wind is howling against the waving trees. No point in lingering long in this wind chill, and soon the high walls of the lane are protecting us from the worst.

Mid & lower chazza still running pretty wet, so wet bum time, and a wait for the Troll at the bottom has us wondering if he’s had a pinch flat or lighting faff? but he appears just as El Pres and Lee take pity and start to head back up…he’d only stopped to put his coat on!

Extension nice and chunky, time check gives us plenty of time to head to Nessit, but the pace has finally told, and our spluttering duo fork off down the KM descent direct to pub.

The rest of us take route 1 down between the DH course, then thrash the ressies. Plenty of smiles at the leathers, then a suprisingly hard into wind ride to the pub.

Chapel bar is the new normal, a little Iccle is taken to finish the barrel, with Weetwood a fine alternative. Calamari a first? Ribaldry already underway before Dunky appears, then in a weird reverse to normal we end up on online collaboration tools and how best to dress to impress at work!!

Luckily Butty takes us back down again, with hilarious spoof instagrammers. Somehow Troll is allowed to order the whisky, but manages to stay in budget..phew. 25% on the voucher bingo.

We await feedback on the effectiveness of the lung cleansing!

Riders: El Pres, PTD, Adrian, Bern, Butty, Coley, Croxy, Doog, 3 Sheds, Troll, Lee, Shaun, Slim, TJ, Rick J, Stunt, G, Mark McD

Pub: Dunc, Nick, Mawds, Simon, El Pud, Dr S

Route: Bl, Zig Zags, Saddlers Way, Lower Teggs, Smithy, reverse ressie to Bob’s Bench, Sutton Hall

Conditions: Mild but very windy

Notes:

A top turnout for this years cocktail caper, although the lack of Christmassy weather may have accounted for the lack of decorated bikes and riders. A lone Father Christmas on El Pres’s backpack was the sum total of our efforts!

Good to see some next generation too, with guest appearance from Shaun, and a first ride for Rick Jackson.

Weather yet again playing a strong part in route choice, with the Teggs top and Teggs cocktail bar both being exposed to the full force of the SE wind.

So the shelter of Bob’s bench was the target, and a bit of up hill and down dale to get there…with a procession of lights somewhat strung out by the time the spearhead arrived.

Menu:

Champagne on arrival (G)

Taster of 18 month old grain spirit (Shaun) …its getting better and better!!

Roasted Chestnuts (heated back to warmth with a blowtorch!), Pigs in blankets with Salted caramel & Soy, or Dark and tangy dipping sauces. Troll

Spanish pigs in blankets Doog

East Side Gin Cocktail, Gin, sugar syrup, lime, cucumber Rick Jackson

“Red one” Bourbon, Chambeaurd, cranberry juice, bitters Troll

Scapegrace New Zealand craft gin & tonic Lee

Green Goblin: Vodka, rum, blue curaco, cointreau, pineapple juice PTD

(not needed in the end, spare cake from saturday night!) Bern

A top selection of sips and snacks, PTD needing to repair a pedal, and many a toast!

Just time to recover glasses and head downhill to meet the non riding fraternity in the chapel bar at Sutton Hall.

Three tables, crackers, table service for drinks, much merriment and chat!

Probably the largest bill in TNR history (first use of a £50 note??) but a smooth settling in the end.

Words by Alex, Photos by El Pres

Crew: El Pres, PTD, 3 Sheds, Troll, Stunt

Pub: Dunc, Adrian

Route: BL, Cat, Danebower Hollow, Cumberland Clough, Standing Stone, Bobs Bench, St Dunstans.

Conditions: Not Raining, Not windy, sub 5.

Notes:

The skies have cleared after the days ration of rain (November now officially the wettest and dullest month of 2019 according to Buxton weather)

It may be cold but it’s not raining, it’s not windy, and we can finally head further than the confines of the forest!

Before we do, plenty of faffage, as PTD astride shiny new Norco 29er full suss running 2.6″ of rubber has to fettle seat position, and rear shock (which is playing up..or more accurately not providing enough play!)

The Troll realises his handlebar mount is on the other bike (and borrows a light from Chris), and we welcome back Mr Ball!

Our legs (and ar*es!) seem to have forgotten how to do the long climb to the cat, which is harder than we recall!! Light traffic, and stunning winter views of the plains and the skies are well worth it.

A bit of skip inspection at the top, definitely some work going on…

Too chilly to linger, and across Danebower..serious amounts of surface water, and warnings from 3 sheds about ruts..

A quick dash on the road and onto Chumby, with more caution about eroded sections from Mr B (secret training rides?? would account for his impressive speed to the cat!)

The normally safe lines on the edges are super slippy, and the mini ravines are chunky!, bedrock corner was a welcome relief..before ensuring enough momentum to cross the double stream! (not seen that much water heading to the waterfall in a long long time)

Cumberland brook also semi aquatic with big boulders! PTD has excitement due to lack of rear suspension, Stunt must have put too much air into his newly serviced from forks..he had some unwanted bounce !

It’s all good and a great change from the last few weeks, which pub discussion on the road to standing stone, and EL Pres with a little help from google gets us food ordered at the Dunny.

Just time for the top LHS (steps have gone!) and a blast round bobs bench.

Excellent Wreckless evapourates very fast, food is fab, and some bizarre 9 ball USA vs Europe pool match on the tellybox is a bit distracting.

Adrian and Dunc join us, we are light on Ribaldry…and the lack of an Austin is cited a possible cause (although we are also missing Butty!)

Mr Ball berates us for having got old and slow when we mention he may have been secretly training in preparation for his return 😉

a mini AoE are still finishing off the spare pies left over from the local pool league match well past the witching hour.

Frost on the cars by the time we got home.

Crew: El Pres, PTD, Bern, TJ, Troll, Slim, Stunt

Pub: Dunc

Route: BL, Zig Zags, Saddlers Way, Lower Teggs, Smithy, Reverse Ressie, White Rabbit Ascent, Between the downhill, Bobs Bench, Smithy.

Conditions: Sub 5, Rain (snow higher up), Wind (easing), very wet trails.

Notes:

November’s Nasty weather continues! another TNR in full wets and many layers…since last week new waterproof trousers and many a pair of new “waterproof” gloves have been purchased!

Bern still winning the best choice of footwear in his Wellies 🙂

Almost half the riders due at BL are running late, so the prompt ones are brought inside by El Pres and given a nice cup of tea 🙂

6:45 and we ride, the “correct” way out of BL, to pick up straggler Pete.

PTD suggests a variation to ensure we don’t just repeat last weeks ride, so Saddlers way it is! By the time we are at Windyways the rain is now full wet snowflakes, doing their best to stick on the wet ground.

We get whooping encouragement from some lads in a white car on the car park as we head down the bridleway…its slippy! Bern nearly comes a cropper when he stops, as wellies on wet rock don’t have the best grip (nor do many winter boots!).

Huge puddles on lower teggs, and a lot of water running at the ford at the bottom of the steps, by now the rain is easing, but the water off the trail is impressive!

More care needed on the bridge over the Langley reservoir spillway, lethal wet timber!

We check in at the Smithy and get the go ahead to order at 8:30 (when we plan to be back), a warming climb to where the white rabbit path meets the mountain bike trail, where TJ provides cooking whisky to warm us from the inside. Slightly comedy moments ensue as we attempt to manipulate tiny plastic glasses without removing gloves! Huge drips from the trees add a little water to the odd one too!

Final downhills and through the “lake of doom” on the corner of the ressie dam wall track, and we are in the land of the fairy houses to park up the bikes.

Wet kit is draped on radiators and in front of the fire, Hobgoblin or Cumberland ale meet the dark or light preferences, and pretentious crisps (Atlas mountains Rosemary and Thyme) turn out to be rather fantastic!

Izzy serves us our food extremely professionally, and the new gear debrief begins!

Berghaus trousers get the thumbs up, the Dhb gloves seem to have performed variably, @PeteTourettes had some comments!!

An eclectic mix of humour, history, politics and trivia as usual, even before the arrival of Dunc.

No prisoners taken on the ride home, every man for himself against the cold!